Yesterday, a friend of mine, Meredith, was in a terrible car accident. Her car was hit head-on by someone that swerved onto her side of the street. It’s suspected that the other driver was intoxicated. Meredith did not survive.
I don’t know what to say. I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what to think.
Meredith had an incredibly contagious laugh, a sweet, caring personality, and unusually small hands that we always joked about.
Unfortunately, I wasn’t super close to Mer in the last year or so. We hung out or talked occasionally, but not often. We did, however, communicate and hang out much more frequently in the first three years of high school. I feel deeply for her friends and family that were more involved in her life than I was recently. If my heart is broken, I know their worlds must be shattered.
Meredith graduated from Lampeter-Strasburg less than a month ago. I attended her graduation party a couple weeks ago. That’s the last time I saw her. She was planning on attending Ursinus College in the fall. While she told me that she was mostly nervous about it, I know she was really excited too.
It’s such a tragic loss. So much about the aftermath brings up old emotions from the days after Isaiah died back in October of 2012. They were both incredibly young, Isaiah at 14 and Meredith at 18. Again, the students and graduates of L-S are grieving.
This is the third friend I’ve lost in two years, but it’s the first one that didn’t die by their own hand. It seems almost more unfair. Or a different kind of unfair at least. It wasn’t a choice. It wasn’t intended. When someone commits suicide, it’s because it’s what they wanted to for however long their ideation lasted before they acted. Sometimes it’s years. And while that’s not fair either, and it’s not okay by any means, it’s a completely different feeling when someone dies in an accident. I think about Meredith’s smile, the joy that she radiated, and the future that she had. And while Isaiah and Makayla had potential and beauty as well, they forfeited it. I hate to say it that way, but it’s true. I believe wholeheartedly that Meredith loved life. That’s the worst part of all of this I think.
I will forever cherish the letters Mer wrote to me while I was in hospitals, gifts she gave me, the pictures I have, and more importantly, all the wonderful memories that we shared and that I hold deep in my heart. Meredith will get a well-deserved spot on my left arm, which will eventually be filled with tattoos dedicated to meaningful people in my life.
If there is a heaven, Meredith of all people will be there.
May 8, 1996 – July 8, 2014